Thursday, January 9, 2014

Tragedy that was my life


01/08/14 Tragedy, that is my life of mistakes!! If you have read my blogs you get the idea not because I have not given it I have put forth that I have been wronged, hurt, used, abused, and burned. I have but not without my mistakes too. We all float on a vast ocean of humanity in a life raft of mistakes committed by us.
Nikki Mitchell the first real love (Puppy Love) almost my first sexual experience if we had not both chickened out. My big mouth talking about that killed us and broke her heart too. She was older I was younger perhaps it would have not gone to life long.
Diane Coots my best friend in high schools sister. I had come home from the Marines and fell head over heals for her. She took my virginity. I wanted her as my wife and ask her several times. I did not know that her stepfather to be fucked her before I did until 25 years later. Her mother married this man with Diabetes and at the time one leg. Diane married his son. My friend her brother last time I spoke with him will not go see his mother or let his children close to that old pedophile. Seems he did an 11 year old and was tried for it In Jones County Texas but not sent to prison. Notice the Tornado wake of destruction of one bad despicable human.
There was Susan Gecho in college I married her a had a daughter Sarah Serenity Green(now Gobbs). I loved Susan but her Grandmother that raised her. Floy came to our home in winters Texas and got Susan and Sarah breaking up my marriage too. Told her that her mother was crazy Floy Hobbs followed Susan's mother across the states and broke up one more marriage leaving two children wards of the stet of Utah. Floy Hobbs and Susan were staunch Church of Christ members of Love Lane Church of Christ in Bozeman Mt. Floy's daughter married a prison guard in Arizona who I was told when Floy came to break this one up stuck a shotgun in her face and invited her to leave his door or enter St. Peters. This family adopted a child, I guess crazy people get to adopt too. Or Floy was sick crazy one!
I was god knows what when I met Cindy Stidolf now don’t know her name. We had problems MY FAULT. I was undiagnosed Bi Polar, ADULT ATTENTION DEFICIT DISORDER and not too stable. My Bitch or a mother paid for her to fly away to Oregon. My mother is also Church of Christ staunchly. My bitch of a mother always told me to mind my own business and leave other people's business alone!!! Cindy was the most beautiful woman I ever saw in my minds eye I see her warm loving smile and red hair. If she came back I would do most anything she ask yes I never stopped loving her. We were married in the early 1980 Susan and I married in 1979 so I might have not been ready. Cindy and I had two wonderful months and two days together. I was not from that moment when mother sent her away, going to speak to my mother, but Steve Stover talked me into relenting.
Cindy Thomas came along we were married I think in 1982 and were married 13 years. Right after the marriage Cindy went to a doctor and was told she had Gonorrhea. I was checked by my doctor for it Dr. Turmbull he said the test was clear that I was not infected. Cindy claimed Virginity too. My father said bull shit she is the one that had it not you. I feel now like I was a cuckold during our marriage. She got her tubes tide after Emily was born. We were living in North Carolina at the time. We did this because she said to me that I would be down at least two weeks if I had my self fixed and we needed the income. She had a college degree too. All she has been is a convenience store clerk. I was a welder.
She said 13 years and not a good day in it.
Gloria Caveat a retired Air Force black woman I would almost give my soul to have her back. I love her still. I did ask her to marry me too. Another black woman I cant recall her name left me for a guy in Houston taxes I too ask her for marriage.
Looking back over old papers and things it seems one of my major problems was not having enough God of this world(MONEY) I just read a letter from Cindy green the 1st and she said she only opened it hoping I sent money. Then there is the letter where Emily my daughter says she hates me because I did not get her a boom box.
I guess The GOD Hasheem, his son Asuah have decided I have ran though my chances and now from 58 till death will be lonely. I can't really blame them except for a gripe being saddled with Bi Polar and ADD up until 42 I think I was non medicated then it took another 10 years to find out the right medications. And giving me to Johan Green and J.W. Green as parents. I wish now I would have been born dead.

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